In honor of Mother’s Day this month, I am sharing a story with you about my Mom. The story describes a lesson on mindfulness. The date of the lesson was April 16, 1988. I remember the date because that was the day I was married and my Mom walked me down the aisle.
Like any nervous bride, I was in a trance and had fixated my gaze at the end of the aisle where the minister and my future husband stood in anticipation. My goal was in sight but I had completely blocked out the present. Then my Mom turned to me and whispered, “Pat, look around you. All these people are smiling at you.” My Mom’s words startled me out of my daze and I did indeed look around. Yes, there were all these happy faces looking at me. I still remember those faces and the names of the people who were there to share in my joy. I would have missed it all, including the memories, if my Mom hadn’t said something to me.
In our fast paced, multi-tasking world, how many of us miss details of the present moment while we rush toward the future? My Mom taught me a lesson in mindfulness long before it became a popular buzz word. Mindfulness isn’t new, though. The techniques of mindfulness are rooted in Buddhism and modern research supports the therapeutic benefits of learning to “stay in the moment”.
We are beginning to understand that mindfulness can play an important role in both our personal and professional lives. Mindfulness is simply being aware of the present moment.
Think about this. Self-awareness is the cornerstone of emotional intelligence. You must practice being aware of your own emotions, as you feel them, before you can learn how to manage your emotions. Once you are proficient with yourself, you can practice getting in tune with the emotions of others and as a consequence manage those relationships more effectively. As you become a more effective leader the productivity of your team improves.
My Mom inadvertently taught me mindfulness as I walked down the aisle. Her words enabled me to be in the moment, get in touch with what was happening in the here and now. Not only did I enjoy that wonderful moment as it was happening; it also gave me wonderful memories to hold onto for as long as I wish to hold them.
Let’s hear from you. Share with us one of your “mindfulness moments” that had a positive impact on you.
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You won’t believe this but I was exploring the Web this morning and Googled ‘Pat Schultz’ blog’, so I read this before you emailed me. How strange!!! Our vibrations are in sync.
Ralph,
We attract to us vibrations that are in tune with our own vibration. Like attracts like. This is a perfect example. Thank you for sharing.
Pat
What a great story! Thanks so much for sharing!
Brian,
Thank you for commenting. “There’s always room for a story that can transport people to another place.”
― J.K. Rowling
I was transported back to 1988!
Pat
I think you mom sounds pretty fantastic. I remember my father and I cracking jokes as we walked down the aisle. I wish I had stopped and looked around though.
Hi Meghan,
Thanks for your comment. My Mom WAS fantastic. The older I get, the more I appreciate her. You are fortunate to have Ave. She will help you “look around” through the eyes of a child and you can’t beat that!
Pat
Hello Pat,
A wonderful story and topic! As you pointed out “being in the moment” can be difficult and, without practice, “staying in the moment” is near impossible with the uber fast pace of the life around us. There is so much clutter! Your wisdom and grace has always been attractive. One of the most difficult challenges I routinely face is stepping back from the emotion of the moment. Near impossible….as once you do the emotion ceases to be raw and, in a sense, emotion. We most certainly want to be in control of our emotions…at least the destructive ones. But then they are learning opportunities if we haven’t ruined business and relationships along the way.. Emotional Intelligence is such an interesting topic from both the business and living side of the equation. Maintaining a balance between being a rational and emotional sentient being seems key to being human, happy and successful. The ole’ “Stop and smell the roses” rings truer with each passing year.
Hi Larry,
Thank you for your comments and insights. Negative emotions can have a destructive impact on our relationships and therefore our life outcomes. Negative emotions need to be felt and acknowledged. It’s part of being human. Unfortunately, acting on the emotions is what gets us into trouble. It all seems to happen so fast and we really have to train ourselves to pause; like counting to 10. Whatever we give out comes back to us. So even though we might feel justified in our negative emotion, why would we want to put all that negative energy out there? I wish I had learned this lesson a long time ago.
I remember that day and how lovely you looked! Thanks for sharing such a nice story about Mom. She taught us many things throughout our lifetimes. How lucky we were to have her with us for so long. She was a lady with great wisdom. And we are enriched from knowing her and experiencing her love.